Trump – Page 19 – Polimericks

August 19 Bonus Limerick

Headline: After Goodyear Bans All Employee-worn Political Clothing, Trump Calls for a Boycott of Goodyear Tires.

It’s hard to believe Donald stood here

And said, “Don’t buy tires from Goodyear!”

Don’t allow MAGA hats?

Then you’re sure to get flats.

But it’s no surprise that’s what you would hear.

August 19

Headline: DeJoy Suspends Postal Service Changes Amid Election Fears

Postmaster Louis DeJoy

Has lost his big chance to destroy

The whole Postal Service.

But still, I feel nervous —

Remember, he’s Donald Trump’s boy…

August 18

Headline:US Calls for Shower rules to be Eased after Trump Hair Complaints

O, Gather bouquets from the flower beds,

And praise all the ways that Don’s power spreads!

He’s freed our Great Nation

From foul regulation

And saved us from unmanly showerheads!

August 17

Headline: USA Reports 1,000 Virus Deaths Per Day Every Day This Month

One thousand new deaths a day,

And Donald has nothing to say.

With no response planned

His head’s in the sand,

Pretending it’s just gone away.

August 14

Headline: Trump Administration Opposes Postal Service Funding

The Post Office? Easy to handle –

Just rip it apart like a vandal.

Then say it’s inept,

Which we cannot accept,

And blame someone else for the scandal.

August 13

Headline: At News Conference, Trump Calls Harris “Nasty”

His news conference wasn’t well played.

Don showed right away he’s dismayed.

So as in the past, he

Pronounced Harris “nasty”:

A woman of whom he’s afraid.

August 12

Headline: Trump Says Americans Will Have to Learn Chinese If Biden Wins

We won’t be all learning Chinese,

And Biden won’t bend or appease –

But one repercussion:

Don needs to learn Russian,

‘Cause that’s what he’ll speak if he flees.

August 11

Headline: Trump says adding his face to Mount Rushmore would be a ‘good idea.’

The ghosts of George, Abe, Tom, & Ted

Have loudly proclaimed from the dead,

“Naught would make us blush more

Than Donald on Rushmore…

We’d even take Nixon instead.”

August 10

Headline: Trump Walks Out Of Press Conference After Reporter Question

Don’t ever ask Don a tough question –

He thinks that’s a shameful transgression.

With nothing to say,

He’ll just run away.

It’s Trumpian passive aggression.

August 8

Headline: Trump Says Biden “Is Against God”

“That Infidel Biden hates God!
Lord, smite the man down by Thy rod!
But disciples, don’t panic!
I’m near-messianic
And walk the Potomac dry-shod.”